We hate to say this, but autos are our lifeline. They’re fast, have a knack of handling traffic during peak hours far better than cars, and are, honestly speaking, quite fun to roam around in. There are some days when we absolutely thank the universe for having the ubiquitous auto driver in our lives; on other days, we just feel like biting their heads off. It happens to you too, right? Just for fun, we decided to recap the conversations every Indian girl has with auto drivers at some point in her life!
1. “Madam, bouni time, chhutta nahin hai”
And you have to surrender the twenty bucks you’re owed and run for it because you’re already late for work. 🙁
2. “Bhaiya, peechhe kya dekh rahe ho, aage dekho!”
Because he can’t keep your eyes off you, and you’re worried that you’re going to die in a traffic accident while being ogled creepily.
Image source: funinventors.com
3. “Bhaiya, [short distance] chaloge?” Nods his head (Nooo!)
“Bhaiya, [long distance] chaloge?” Nods his head (Yess!)
4. “Sattar rupay lagega, madam!”
Sattar? KIS khushi mein?!
5. You say: “Bhaiya, GK chaloge?” He says: “Nahin, Jamna paar!”
Man, we don’t CARE where you want to go if you’re not willing to take us home. 🙁
6. “Paanch sau ka chhutta do na, bhaiya!”
C’mon, who’s not had this happen at least once?
7. “Boss, boss…side main daba do…boss, udhar nahin, idhar!”
Sometimes, he just doesn’t want to let you off. It’s a struggle.
8. “Boss, jaldi chalao na!”
Just when you are rushing to go to work, or there is an emergency, your friendly auto driver decides to dawdle. When you’re okay for time, though, he’s practising his skills for Formula One and you’re screaming: “Dheerey, boss, dheerey!”
Image source: rickshawchallenge.com
9. “Boss, lighter hai?”
And he says: “Madam, maachis hain, beedi bhi chahiye?” #AwkwardMoment
10. “Arre, madam, paanch rupaiya – ka kya kich kich karte ho!”
It’s always kich kich when we want our money back. Or it’s khulla-nahin-and-whizzing-off time.
11. Suddenly, there’s Snoop Dogg playing on his tape. #SwagModeOn
Let’s just say we’re glad there isn’t any Himesh playing on that tape.
Image source: lifebeyondsales.blogspot.in
12. “Dada, shabdhaane chaalan!”
When you’re desperate enough to agree to be the sixth person in a shared auto in Calcutta. It’s futile to beg him to drive carefully, you know, but you still gotta ask.
13. When he refuses to take you to a place and you say, “Arrey, bhai, phir Dubai jaoge kya?”
Haha, BOOYAH!
14. Bhaiya, meter fast hai kya?
Those things travel faster than Chacha Chaudhary’s brains.
Image source: Mid Day
15. He says: “Ladkiyon ko beedi nahin peeni chahiye!”
And you say: “Bhaiya, aap gutkha khaoge toh aap ko throat cancer hoga.”
16. When you want to go from Vasant Vihar to Saket, and he says “India Gate mein jam hai!”
Delhi girls, you’ll understand why this is ABSURD!
17. “Madam, aap City Walk Mall mein shopping kar rahe ho, aur dus rupay ke liye jhagra kar rahe ho? Chhee, chhee!”
My 10 rupees. MINE. I will fight for it.
Image source: johnluth.blogspot.in
18. “Madam, aap ghar mein akele rahte ho kya?”
And that’s why you carry pepper spray in Delhi.
19. “Meri auto, meri marzee.”
That’s a man who’s soon going to learn all about the power of a woman’s lungs and the range of her vocabulary.
20. When you say: “Please, bhaiya, music aahista karo” and he pretends like he hasn’t heard.
That radio-volume argument sure drains your energy.
21. “Ladki pehli bar dekh rahe ho kya? Ghar mein ma-behen nahi hai ?”
#PervertAlert
22. You say: “Bhaiya, meter se hi chalana!” And he smirks. SMIRKS.
Argh, hate it when we’re desperate enough for transport to still have to climb in.
Image source: whiteindianhousewife.com
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